trusting your gut: kate hampton

Hello Sometimes Always Never readers! I’m so excited to be guest posting for Whitney while she’s in Africa changing the world. I blog over at What Kate Likes about a lot of fashion-related things and occasionally things that are a bit deeper and more personal. I’m excited to have the chance to get into a meatier topic than I normally do, without it seeming random or out of place.

When Whitney approached me about guest blogging for her, she told me that she wanted everyone to write about listening to their gut. To be honest, I really had to think about the topic and do some serious introspection before agreeing.

I am a planner, an obsessive, a person who doesn't even go to the grocery store without a defined list of what exactly I’m going to buy. I don’t take risks or jump into something feet-first unless I've considered all options/consequences/benefits/rewards. I’m the type of person who peels off band-aids bit by bit, even though ripping the whole thing off is much easier and less painful. Making decisions based solely on what I feel in my gut or heart is right is something I seriously struggle with. Maybe it’s the fact that I have a hard time giving up control, maybe it’s the fact that I don’t like taking risks without knowing exactly what will happen.

However, lately I've been thinking more and more about past decisions I've made and how, even when I carefully weighed the pros and cons, things didn't turn out quite like I’d imagined or thought they would. I feel like over-thinking every decision is using up so much energy and brainpower. I’m so in awe of Whitney and her ability to just instinctively say “yes” to this trip to Africa and not get bogged down in the details.

So I’m going to make a conscious effort to listen to myself when I need to make a decision. I know I’ll still probably over-think, but I’m going to do my best to listen to what my heart and instincts are telling me and just go for it. I’m slightly nervous about how much of a change this will be for me, but I think that it’s definitely something I need to do! I’m really going to take Tina Fey’s advice to heart and say “yes” first (or no or whatever it is that my instincts are telling me is right) and then figure all the details out afterwards. Nothing needs to be fully thought-through in order to be amazing or to at least have the possibility to be amazing, which is something I definitely need to remember all the time.

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Read more of Kate's posts on her blog, What Kate Likes

trusting your gut: keith wynn

Listening to your gut. What does that phrase mean to you? We hear that phrase a lot but I wonder if we truly ponder its meaning. Listening to our gut, or our intuition, is a “learned skill” in my opinion. I say this because it goes against a lot of what we’re taught in life. We are taught to apply reason and rationality to all decisions so as to make the best informed choice. In other words, use your head, not your gut. But what about those times when our gut is telling is something completely different than what our head is telling us?

I was faced with this internal conflict once. It was a few years ago and I was at a crossroads in my life. I felt I needed a change. A big change. I had spent my entire life in my hometown and I didn’t feel I was going anywhere. It felt like I was reliving the same day over and over. Have you ever felt that way? So I decided to just move. Seriously, just completely pack up and move to an entirely new city and start over.

Most of my family and friends were against this idea. They were saying it was impractical and something that only worked in “the movies”. But my gut was telling me that this was the right decision. My heart was telling me that this was what I needed to do.

It ended up being the best decision I’ve ever made in my life. I have a career I love, wonderful friends here, and I LOVE the town I moved to. It’s truly home to me now and I know that this is where I belong. I listened to my gut, and it changed my life :)

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Read more of Keith's posts on his blog, Musings of an Unapologetic Dreamer

trusting your gut: lauren leighton

The definition of gut. Answer numero uno is an obvious one: the stomach or belly. 

Number two (and the informal definition according to the world wide web) is personal courage and determination; toughness of character. 

What is a perfect marriage of the two? The action of following your gut. Combining that uncomfortable, yet valid, feeling your tummy tells you is scary, but right with those innate brain waves encouraging you to act accordingly. As I make tough decisions in my 20-something stage of life, my mother always asks, "What does your gut tell you?" I love and hate that question because it usually (more like mostly) reveals the answer. 

One specific time where I turned to my mother for advice was when I found myself extremely unhappy in New York City. I know. Most of you are probably reading this and thinking, "Unhappy in New York? Isn't that supposed to be like one of the coolest places to live and work?" Well yes, yes it is a cool place to live, just not for this girl. I found it to be the loneliest place on earth. Even though there are 8.337 million people in Manhattan, I constantly craved human interaction, big hugs, a warm touch. I had a super sweet gig at Oprah Magazine assisting the publisher (still miss her a lot), but that island just wasn't for me. 

I knew I had to make a change. I loved my job, but it wasn't enough to keep me locked up in a concrete cage, constantly confined by brick walls and stilettos. I had to make a change, therefore I followed my gut (thanks mom!) and packed up my 500 square foot studio apartment, one sweet pug and essentially two years of city life to move to Denver, Colorado. 

Why Denver you ask? I have always loved this place and it is where my brother, his wife and two babies live. There is nothing sweeter than family in my mind (and waking up to dry, crisp air and the Rocky Mountains as life's screensaver). Was I scared to pick up my life and move across the country? Absolutely. Did that stop me? No. I knew there was no way I could possibly be unhappier than I was, so why not just follow my gut to happiness?

I love it here in Colorado. I have made some incredible friends and can't believe I lived in such a personal slump for a full two years, but at the same time I am eternally grateful for those two years because they taught me a lot about myself. I will always have my New York to thank for helping me grow up (pretty fast!).

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Read more of Lauren's posts on her blog, Borrowed Light. 

trusting your gut: robyn coale

I had it all planned out. 

Living in New York City, completing my dietetic internship at NYU and getting my masters in Clinical Nutrition. I had worked hard in college and thought I had a pretty competitive application.

But a good resume and transcripts don’t impress God. And it surely doesn’t change His plans. 

I applied to six schools. And on match day, I opened up my letter to read ‘Congratulations, you’ve been accepted to the University of Virginia Health System dietetic internship.”

I sat there in Starbucks in complete and utter shock. Everyone around me continued on sipping their coffee, typing away on their Macbooks while my world came crashing down.

My eyes welled with tears. Leaving my computer unattended, I ran outside to call my mom. I needed someone to hear my disappointment. My heart ached.

It was a bit dramatic, but I was crushed. Everything I had been hoping for and planning on was wiped away in the click of a mouse. After lots of tears and talking to my brothers and mom I tried to pull it together. After all, I had actually gotten an internship- something only 50% of applicants could say. 

That day I told my mom I didn’t want to go, I didn’t want to move to Charlottesville. That wasn’t what I had planned and I struggled to rearrange all the pieces of the puzzle.

But over the next month something in my heart changed and I felt a pull. I called the internship director at UVA to accept the internship and began planning my move to the east coast.

And I went. With my Honda Civic full of everything I owned, I drove to Charlottesville not knowing a single soul. Excited yet terrified. Unsure yet hopeful. Anxious yet assured.

Inside my head, I was hot mess. But something inside my heart felt settled. 

This was a new season, and I was ready to embrace it. Whatever that meant.

Thankfully, I am an extrovert. But moving to a new city without knowing anyone forces you to move out of your comfort zone. Say yes to things you wouldn’t normally say yes to. Do things you wouldn’t normally too. To get a bit uncomfortable. Two months after moving, at an attempt to meet anyone and everyone, I ventured downtown to a movie screening for Forks Over Knives that was followed by a panel discussion. 

And on that panel was a brilliant doctor. I was passionate about nutrition [like, I like food a lot- especially vegetables] and I couldn’t believe there was a doctor out there that shared that same passion. So that day I asked him if I could work for him.  

And a week later he called with a job offer. 

A job I thought didn’t actually exist, but here I was 700 miles from home in a place I thought I’d never be. But I was so thankful I was. 

The past two years in Charlottesville have been a fierce yet beautiful transformation. Feeling completely lost and lonely, not knowing where you’re supposed to be or what the next step is.  At one moment feeling on top of the world, but the next feeling like your life is a tropical storm. But little by little, I’ve seen the reasons behind the journey out here. I’ve been blessed with such rich community, and amazing job, and sweet, sweet friends. The ones you’ll have in your wedding. The ones you call for favors that seem absurd yet totally okay to ask for. The ones you feel so grateful to soak up and do life with. And ever so slowly I’ve planted my feet and this place has become home.

Sometimes it takes being stripped of everything you know to trust in the plan for your life. To lean into something bigger than yourself and take a step out in faith. 

But it all began with the pull in my heart to move. To say yes. And go all gas, no brake.

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Read more of Robyn's posts on her blog, The Real Life RD.