we are engaged!! :)

I couldn’t be more thrilled to share with you all that Chris asked me to marry him on Saturday night. We are both overjoyed with the news! I'm so excited to share it with all of you wonderful readers! You have seen me through heartache, good and bad relationships and the very beginning with Chris.

I'm so grateful for your sweet emails and comments throughout our relationship and am so glad you have been part of our story as readers! The blogosphere is a weird place. I recently did a coaching call with someone from another country and at the start of the session, she said, “how is Chris?” I thought: someone in another country that I have never met is asking me about Chris. How wild! And, also, how wonderful – that I feel so cared for in this little corner of the internet.

So, before I share how it happened, I wanted to thank you all for your support of us as a couple!

//

Months ago, Chris asked me what my perfect Atlanta day would be. I told him I’d want to do a super hard workout class with him + my brothers, then go to a good brunch. After that, I wanted to spend the day at the pool with friends, then go on a date with him.

Saturday, Chris sneakily put these plans in motion without me discovering how intentional it was. I thought my brothers decided on a whim to attend the class and brunch with us, but little did I know it was all pre-planned.

After a wonderful day with friends & family, Chris picked me up for dinner. We drove to one of my favorite honey holes in the city, Lullwater, to go on a walk before dinner. We walked for a little while, Moscow Mules in tow, when I suggested we turn around so we could get to the restaurant before we got too hungry. But he told me he wanted to walk a little further.

About a minute later, we turned a corner and I saw a sweet picnic set up by the water. He’d enlisted my brothers’ help to set up the dinner and I was completely shocked! They’d all been in on the plan all day to have our dinner el fresco and had snuck out of our house to set it up while I got ready.

I was so happy! But had no clue he was going to propose.

After dinner, we headed to his house for a dessert he’d made. While in the woods, we got REALLY hot as the nighttime humidity rose. We were also by the water, so we got eaten by the bugs. Normally, I want to eat every meal outside, but, with the bugs being so bad, I told him I wanted to eat inside. Unusually assertive, Chris insisted we sit outside on the roof for dessert. I was surprised he was so opinionated about it, but didn’t really think twice.

When we climbed on the roof, he’d set up another picnic blanket – surrounded by candles. And yet, I still had no clue he was going to propose. I said, “wow this is a fancy date!” and didn’t think anything of it!

Chris brought up dessert, which was an ice cream sundae bar. He knows ice cream is my favorite food, of course!, and had done this for our first Valentine’s Day together. He walked me through the options for toppings and then said he had spoons in his pocket. He pulled out the spoon for me, and it had a ribbon around it. I looked at the ribbon and noticed there was a ring tied to the spoon, which said will you marry me?

I was in a state of shock! I kept asking him over and over if he was serious. And then I said yes!

We went inside after that to eat the ice cream and drink champagne. Chris gave me a stack of cards, on which he’d written firsts from our relationship – the first time he knew he wanted to ask me on a date, the first time he knew he liked me, the first time he knew he loved me, etc. After about fifteen firsts, I got to the last one, which was the first time he knew he wanted to marry me.

The entire day and night felt magical and I’m still on cloud nine. I am excited beyond words to start this new chapter with Chris. I just keep thinking I’m so excited to brush our teeth together at night and take road trips and come home to each other at the end of the workday. It sounds silly to be craving those mundane things but, the truth is, those are my favorite things to do with him – the every day.

My entire being just feels so grateful. For the way people have shared in our joy during the last few days and celebrated with us. I also feel so grateful for how God has blessed our relationship during the last year and half. I prayed for my husband long before I met Chris and I'm overwhelmed by how faithful the Lord has been. Chris is a better man than I could have imagined marrying and I'm honored to call him my fiance today.

Thank you again for sharing in our joy! :) Happy Wednesday!

The Biggest Lessons from my 20s {part two}

This post is part of a five-week series, The Biggest Lessons from my 20s. During the five weeks leading up to my 29th birthday, I'll be discussing the greatest lessons this decade has taught me. Read the most recent post, which is To Assume People Have Good Intentions here.  

There are two things I remember disliking in fourth grade; both of which always took place at the drinking fountain:

1. It was the first year most girls started wearing bras and boys would always stand behind us, pull back the elastic and let it go. It would snap on your back and then, worst of all, everybody would know you were wearing a bra. It was enough to make a nine year old girl pray she never, ever needed to wear one of those things.

2. If you weren't defending your training bra, you were always at risk for someone to tell you, just as you got enough water to feel hydrated after a hot Indiana recess: save the whales! Which was the worst. You weren't trying to hurt the whales! You even made your mom cut the plastic rings that held together soda cans. You cared about the ocean! Also, Indiana was landlocked, people!

The truth is, in 1996 in Zionsville, Indiana, the chance of us being the reason the ocean would dry up was, well, completely unreasonable. There would always be, at our school, enough water for every fourth grade body to refuel after four square.

I was thinking recently about how that idea - that there will always be enough - applies to our 20s, too. When you feel like everyone around you is getting the things you want, it's tempting to want to yell, save the whales! Save me a boyfriend and a husband. Save some promotions and raises for me! Save me a piece of land and the chance to have a baby. Just slow down people! 

It's easy to feel like the people around you getting more of what you want means you will receive less.

But, this is not an economy of scarcity. 

Just like there was enough water in fourth grade for me, the kids around me and the whales in the oceans, there is enough for all of us today, too.

Life might not look exactly as you thought it would by 28, but the things that are meant to be yours will become yours.

This has been, easily, one of the hardest and most important lessons my 20s has taught me. It has allowed me to better celebrate my friends when they hit milestones I've not yet reached. It has helped me to feel more at ease with where I am in my own life. It has allowed me to feel at peace with the direction of my career, my relationship status and living situation in Atlanta.

It has allowed me to believe that I am exactly where I'm meant to be in this moment. This life is unfolding exactly as it should. And that's really beautiful. 

Five Facts from a Guy {about when you know you’ve got it good.} #10

Happy first Friday in August, dear readers! I always love that Friday feeling, but this week I'm feeling extra amped. I'm staying in town and am thrilled about it. Tomorrow, I'm doing a Core Power Yoga class, going to True Food then hitting the pool. Wahoo!

To kick off the weekend, I have another round of Five Facts from a Guy! Today we're checking in with Peter, who recently proposed to my dear friend, Jordan. I first met Peter when he and Jor came to Atlanta in 2014. I know I have no proof of this, but, even then I knew he was the guy for her. I was so happy when they got engaged in July! Today he's posting about when to know you've got a good thing going.

And, in case you've missed them, catch up on the previous Five Facts from a Guy posts.

1. Be willing to try new things. I guess it’s expected that by our mid-twenties we’re supposed to know exactly what we like and don’t like, but I’m not totally sold on that idea.  I can tell you unequivocally that I’m not really into mayonnaise, and as embarrassing as it is, traditional sun tan lotion kind of weirds me out because of multiple similarities between the two.  However, I’m slowly warming up to spray on sunscreen, due to my fiance’s general distaste for skin cancer.  A true win win.  In the same vain, she’s totally willing to try a “no thank you bite” of whatever exotic seafood dish I’ve ordered for dinner – even though she hates pretty much everything that lives in of the ocean that isn’t a mermaid.  Anyway, my point is to not be afraid of change and through compromise you sometimes have way more fun than you’ve ever expected.

2. Be authentic. Far too frequently people to try to manufacture a persona they’ve decided is “who they want to be” but isn’t who they actually are.  It turns out false appearances are pretty tough to keep up and usually quite transparent.  If you don’t like PF Changs because it reminds you of your ex-boyfriend, that’s something I should know.  If my favorite food in the whole wide world is candy corn, I’m not going to be afraid to tell you.  The people who live in catalogs aren’t real – and if they were, I bet they’d stink.  And sometimes I can still disagree with the “real you.”  For example, my fiancé pretends to like football games, but happily let me know she thinks the game should be shortened to eliminate the fourth quarter – because she gets bored.  That’s just crazytalk.  All in all, I think people with substance are cool.  We’ve all got some kind of weirdo baggage.  Share and embrace in it.  It’s what makes you you.

3. Laugh. This one’s pretty simple.  Do it.  Laugh at each other, laugh with other people and never grow too old to laugh at yourself.  Sometimes you accidentally go pee right after you’ve cut a bunch of jalapenos for your fiancé’s recipe (she was just my girlfriend then, but I bet she’s still behave the exact same way today) and before you know it, she’s rolling on the floor in laughter as you’re getting in touch with feelings you never knew existed in places that aren’t appropriate to talk about on the internet. In the end, that was funny for me too, but for FAR different reasons.  Laughter can take different shapes.  It could be the giggles you still share over the first time you accidentally kissed years before you even thought about dating or the uncontrollable fits you experience laughing along with trash TV shows like Hollywood Game Night.  Either way, laugh.  Life’s too short to be serious all the time.

4. Share your friends. The people someone surrounds them self with say a lot about who they are, who they’ve been and ultimately, who they’re going to be.  You need to be comfortable with and embrace her friends, just as she should do the same with yours.  Knowing that my “new girlfriend” could survive an afternoon (more than 6 hours alone) in the gauntlet with my mostly single and untamed fraternity brothers while accompanying me to our first wedding together was an immediate sign this relationship was going places I never imagined.  Similarly, when I found myself texting her friends to get together for dinner while she was out of town for vacation, I realized it was game-over.  One of the things I’m most looking forward to is seeing these two crazy worlds collide in just a few months.  I’m not sure the world is ready for what’s to come.

5. Tell me when I’m being stupid. If you’re dating someone who tells you that you’re perfect all the time without exception – that person is a liar.  We’ve all have bad days, accidentally drank too much on a Thursday or sometimes get frustrated and accidentally hurt a friend’s feelings.  I think that’s part of life.  At least it’s part of mine.  It takes someone special to help you realize that you’ve goofed up and need to correct course, sometimes without even speaking those words.  It just as important to have someone in your corner who’s not unafraid to tell you that you’re being an a punk as it is to have someone pat your back when you’ve succeeded.

you have 48 hours in raleigh, north carolina: GO!

I mentioned a few weeks ago that Chris and I had an awesome time in Raleigh in July. It was my first time there and the city had such a quaint town-like vibe. I love a city that can masquerade as a town.

With the help of my friends Claude and Kristina, I put together a Raleigh city guide. Next time you find yourself with 48 hours in that little city, here's how I suggest you spend it.

{If you're new to my City Guides, check out How to Spend a Weekend in Austin and 48 Hours in Nashville}

eat.

Finch's - This Raleigh staple has been around for more than 20 years. It's not fancy, but it's the perfect spot to get a hearty breakfast at a low cost.

Mami Nora's - I've not eaten a lot of Peruvian food, but, apparently this is the place to do it. It's a hole in the wall and you can eat a half chicken + two sides for $8. If you're not a fan of crowds, avoid it at lunchtime.

Chuck's - Craving a burger? Look no further. Named the Best Burger in Raleigh, their half-pound, house ground burgers hit the spot.

Raleigh Times - Quite possibly the most intriguing to me, this is where the local newspaper used to be printed. It looks to be more like bar food, but it's a downtown staple. Worth a stop!

Sitti - Known for super authentic Lebanese food, the hummus is said to be a must try. According to Yelp, the service can be hit or miss, but the kabobs make it worth it.

The Pit - Have you ever seen House of Cards? The barbecue place in Season 1 always made me want to have a spot like that in Atlanta. Apparently this is it for the people of Raleigh. All BBQ, all local.

Fiction Kitchen - Vegeterians unite! They've got a full-veg and some vegan (and gluten free!) offerings. Made from fresh, local ingredients, they even have vegan chicken biscuit and gluten free pancakes! It's on the top of my Raleigh list for my next visit.

Humble Pie - With local offerings and a patio + tiki bar (!) this one has my heart for dinner in Raleigh.

image

caffeinate.

Brew Coffee Bar - This was my first stop in Raleigh in July.  I loved it! The service was awesome, the drinks were great and they have almond milk. Sold & sold.

Yellow Dog Bread Company - Known for their coffee and baked goods, this is the perfect stop downtown to grab your caffeine and explore.

Cafe de los Muertos - A quirky little spot downtown. They're all about local roasters & local food. I'm all about that & that, too.

Morning Times - This is right above Raleigh Times. If you're there for breakfast, you ought to grab some Joe, too.

Sola Coffee Shop - Although it is not downtown, it has mini donuts and local music. With coffee! Need I say more?

Benelux Coffee - This one is in Cameron Village. Their coffee is brewed locally, but inspired by Belgian brews.

drink.

Big Boss - Brewery + darts and ping pong for those of us who aren't so into beer :)

Cornerstone and Brooklyn Heights - Side by side bars in neighboring houses.

The Anchor Bar - A new bar in downtown that's known for its fuss-free cocktails.

Foundation - An underground bar with swanky cocktails

State of Beer - A new, chill bar that allows you to sit at picnic tables while you drink your brews. Oh. And eat sandwiches. Sammies!

Boylan Bridge - Known for a patio that overlooks downtown. Patio = my jam-io.

image

play.

Pullen Park - As the first public park in North Carolina, this park sits next to NC State. It's great for intramurals and outdoor dates. Which are the best kind of dates, in my opinion.

Lake Johnson - The perfect spot for kayaking, canoeing and light hiking.

Shelley Lake - If you're looking for a paved and scenic running trail, this is the spot. The 2-mile loop circles the lake and is surrounded by greenery. My rollerblades are calling!

listen. 

Pour House - A small little venue where you can hear live, local music.

The Ritz - This venue was just renovated this year and is a good spot to see larger bands than Pour House.

C-Grace - A cocktail + jazz bar with only $5 cover. That's what I'm talking about.

Oak City 7 - Free music on Thursday nights downtown.

Happy Raleighing!