Gag me with a wooden spoon!

I find it hard to believe that I've now had two people in my life confess that they hate sock feet.

My friend, Sara, as well as my roommate, Katie, despise socks if they're filled with feet. They also despise feet that are covered in socks.

Katie recently said that she really tries to be understanding when someone wants to wear socks around their own home, considering it is their home and not hers. However, she doesn't like it.

Upon such confession, my other roommate, Emily, admitted that the way Katie feels about socks is similar to the way she feels about the chocolatey shell of a Dairy Queen chocolate dip cone. It just rubs her the wrong way.

My sister, Ashley, hates wooden utensils. She has such a hatred for them that it is truly more a fear than a distaste (which is funny because you could not pay her to taste anything on a wooden utensil, not even on a popsicle stick). If you approach her with a wooden spoon, she will run.

What is it that causes such aversions? Is it something that happened to us when we were younger and we just don't realize it?

Although I admit that there are a number of things I prefer to steer clear of, the most common is unstirred cottage cheese (though a very close second is sweet potatoes). It almost makes me queasy just typing the words. Something about it just does me in.

I was thinking about this scenario the other day, and I decided it would be terrible. Imagine if the queen came over for dinner and Ashley and I had to serve her cottage cheese. However, upon entering the kitchen, which we could not leave until we served her, we discovered that the cottage cheese was unstirred and the kitchen was equipped with only wooden utensils.

We can't phone a friend because we have no cell phone service. We can't even create smoke signals because we're enclosed in the kitchen. And, on this one, unusual day, my telepathy seems to be failing me entirely.

If Ashley were to stir it with her hands, it would be unsanitary, and the queen deserves a properly sanitized meal.

Even as a seasoned FPS participant, I feel completely at a loss. We'd probably have to ask the queen to stir the cottage cheese herself. And if we're asking the queen to do all the work anyway, she probably won't ever want to come back over for her daily lunch of cottage cheese (that queen is one light eater).

I realize that I will someday have to overcome my fear of unstirred cottage cheese. But it's not the worst fear in the world to have, and it's certainly easy to avoid.

Just imagine if you were afraid of the toilet. Or showering. Or bathrooms in general. That would be a crippling fear.

I think that Fear Factor should do an Average Joes episode, where they bring on people who are afraid of super common things.

And, Howie Mandel, from Deal or No Deal can be a celebrity guest, since he is afraid of being touched.

It would be a really big hit, because no one would understand why, exactly, Sara and Katie are afraid of sock feet. They'd have to have a duel, wearing socks and no shoes, and they'd have to cover their hands with socks too. Just to make it even more intense.

By the end of the show, Ashley would be serving me sweet potatoes and unstirred cottage cheese.

The queen can come too.