take it from history

"How about I read you a little bit of my favorite poetry? Cocktails at Tiffany's calls for classic charm. Oscar de la Renta sleeveless silk full skirted dress with black patent leather bow belt. Now that is pure poetry." Carrie Bradshaw

After running the Chicago marathon in the hottest temperatures in race history, I can safely say I have very little desire to complete another marathon for quite some time. (The article claims the temperature was 88 degrees, but I promise you when we ran through Little Mexico, it was over 90).

However, while my marathon itch has been successfully scratched, I must admit that it's still nice to be able to say I've run a marathon.

Non-runners generally are stunned for about twenty seconds, then they say, "Wait, you mean a half-marathon right?" or "Not, like, 26 miles, though...right?"

With runners, it's just as rewarding, because when you tell those who have also done a marathon about your accomplishment, you have the insta-bond. No matter the difference in time or location, there is still an understanding that passes through the conversation. A feeling that you have both experienced extreme discomfort, and yet, the way you felt once you crossed the finish line made it all worth it.

I've decided that being able to say you've completed the task, combined with the mutual-experience-bond must be the only reason that anyone would ever want to get on board the WhiteKnightTwo (aka Eve, named after his mom) with Sir Richard Branson.

Yes, it would be cool to be able to say you've been in space. And yes, it would be a serious bonding experience with those around you. But, there is no way you could pay me to be the guinea pig for this idea.

And, furthermore, not only is Mr. Branson not paying his sweet little test drivers, but the passengers are paying him...

...$200,000

Aka the cost of four years of college at not just Indiana University, but the University of Chicago as well.

Aka almost enough to buy a Ferrari 575M Maranello and more than enough to buy the Porsche GT2, which, mind you, is being called the fastest car ever (don't let my Jeep Liberty fool you, now, I'm a car guru...)

Or, most importantly, you could buy 118 of Oscar de la Renta's White Double Face Linen Strapless dresses from his Resort 2009 collection (I may have lied about the cars. But clothes, I know.) Granted, if you want the belt and shoes to accompany the dress, you can only have 74 of them. But, hey, I'd be happy with just one.

And yet, there are some people who would cash in the college, cars and clothes in order to spend a few minutes checking out the moon.

OK.

I admit it. It would be cool the see the moon.

But for now, I think I'd rather sit in my Porsche while wearing my Oscar dress (and belt...but not shoes, not in the Porsche!) as I thumb through a picture book of the moon. I trust Neil Armstrong.

THE american idol

In 2002, YouTube did not exist. Neither did Facebook, TMZ or Gawker. Britney and Christina were still two battling pop princesses. And Nick and Jessica were planning their wedding.

...Oh how times have changed.

2002 also marks the start of American Idol.

What is now not just a TV show, but an empire, with Ford, Coca-Cola, AT&T- and now Edy's- all contributing to it's reign.

Currently hosting auditions for the eighth season, Simon, Randy and Paula show no signs of handing over the crown any time soon, either.

While I admit that I was an avid fan of Season 1 (front row tickets at the concert, mind you) I can't help but wonder if it might be time to call it quits. While it might initially appear that they should continue as they are- with a high number of viewers and outstanding ratings- it seems to be losing some of it's triumph.

The winners aren't really idols in America anymore. While Kelly, Carrie and Katharine are enjoying success, Ruben Studdard and Taylor Hicks are hardly leading lives I'd aspire to have.

Kelly is lucky, she was the first American Idol. She is the original face of the show. It's definitely not as powerful to be the sixth or seventh (or possibly someday 100th) American Idol.
Besides, it would be sweet to be the tenth and final American Idol. I can only imagine the ratings for the the last season. I bet even Kelly would come back to perform- maybe she and Justin Guarini would do a duet.

I was thinking about auditioning for the eighth season, but instead I think I will stick with the true American way- I'm going to hope to be in the right place at the right time. It worked for Britney...

Think Globally, Act Locally

"It ain't much I'm asking if you want the truth. Heres to the future; hear the cry of youth. I want it all, I want it all, I want it all, and I want it now." Queen

My first real dose of responsibility came in the form of a key chain--a Digital Doggie Giga Pet, to be exact. Called Isis by me (and I'm sure much more unpleasant names by others, as the clear plastic toy managed to make noise constantly), the digital pet definitely taught me a thing or two about taking care of others.

I remember sitting in Mrs. Orr's third grade class, making plans for our upcoming restaurant day, when out of the locker came an odd noise. Like a true mother to her child, I knew it was my baby's cry.

Luckily, there were a number of other mothers and fathers among this group of ten year olds and quite a few of us darted to the lockers and dug into the realms of our backpacks. The interruption caused pure pandemonium in the once peaceful classroom.

...And that was the day Giga Pets (and Tamagotchi's!) were banned from Mrs. Orr's classroom.

The thing about Isis, though, was that I loved to play with her when she was fun. I loved feeding her and "walking" her, but once things started to go a wry, I wasn't quite as interested- thus she was banned to my backpack.

In a sense, this is the American way. We want the fun of it all and the fruit of the labor, but we don't actually want to do the work.

Instead of buckling down and persevering through the hard times, though, we've made alternative options.

For example, kids (well, mostly kids) want to play video games, however they don't want to be overweight and out of shape. So, instead of creating an incentive and telling the children that if they ride their bikes for an hour they can play video games for an hour too, we give them Wii. Because I am somewhat of a Wii virgin, I don't want to speak poorly of the invention. From what I can tell, it seems much more promising than Mario Kart or '007. However, the toy does seem to fit right into the American lifestyle.

Eating locally is another societal trend. Nothing is cooler than wearing Tory Burch flats while carrying an eco-friendly Anya Hindmarch tote full of avocados and rhubarb from your own backyard, apparently.

However, while we all want the benefits of the local produce, we don't want to put the work into a garden. And so, people like Trevor Paque are willing to lend a hand. He probably had no idea that his green thumb would one day turn into green in his bank account (And that right there is the beauty of doing what you love).

Some people claim that they want the health benefits but just don't have the time to grow a garden. (While this may be true, I think it's also because they want to be able to joke with their neighbors about sweet Trevor and his carrots- you've got to keep up with the times!) In the chaos of it all, though, maybe it turns out that you don't really reap what you sow. Perhaps, in the end, you reap what you can afford.

In these troubled times, though, we should all take a moment to look at Berea College. While I personally am not quite ready to sacrifice IU's athletics and accommodations, you can't help but be impressed by their work ethic. I'm not sure if raw manual labor will ever be as trendy as raw Mange-Tout, but it's worth a shot. Before we know it, we might be calling farmers kings and iBankers paupers.

Married couple caught: husband with mustache kissing wife in high heels

When Indianapolis was first transformed from small farming communities into the bustling city it is today, the women ran into some trouble.

Those urban-chic ladies were struggling because they were not used to the cracks and holes in the grates of the new streets. Their city-styling high heels were getting stuck in the gaps and they were breaking their ankles.

Out of anger (I'd be mad if my high-heeled Oxfords broke too) they decided they'd sue the city of Indianapolis for damage.

In an act of self-defense, Indianapolis decided to outlaw high heels. Therefore, it is technically illegal to wear high heels in the street in Indianapolis.

Thank goodness New York City does not have the same law, or Kelly Ripa might have thrown a fit. The recent Regis and Kelly High Heel-A-Thon would have been far less successful had police officers been trying to cuff the stilettoed athletes.

High heels are not the only offensive fashion piece in Indy. Men face a restrictive law as well: mustaches are illegal if the bearer has a tendency to habitually kiss other humans.

You might think these laws seem a little ridiculous, but, I certainly wouldn't say that. Not because I hate 'staches and shoes, but because it goes against my principles. One of my strictest rules is that I never speak poorly of where I'm from.

I just always feel so sad for those people that hate their hometowns or states. It makes me wonder what kind of horrible upbringing they had.

Being from Indiana, it's especially important to hold steadfast to my rule. People are always eager to call it a fly-by state or make a joke about cornfields. (How quickly they forget the Colts...!) But, I know there really is more than corn in Indiana and I'm proud to be a Hoosier.

After the most recent issue of Indianapolis Monthly hit the stands, I was proud not only to be from Indiana, but from Zionsville as well. Some may call it a sleepy and sheltered bubble, but it's part of who I am, and I'm happy to call it my home. Besides, we may have an early town curfew, but we're allowed to wear high heels all we want.