Who I'm Not

I recently told Chris that I have this vision of us being a couple that eats dinner and then watches TV together. Doesn't that sound nice after a busy day of work? Eating a healthy dinner and turning on a show you're both hooked on? 

I think it sounds lovely. 

But, here's the thing: we aren't that couple.

Neither of us even has one current show we follow. We're not caught up on anything. I think we've maybe watched four episodes of a show together - ever. We've seen one movie in the theaters. I would guess we have watched three at home. 

See? We are not that couple. But the idea of it sounded so appealing to me.

The exchange got me thinking about how sometimes we want to be something even if it doesn't fit within our reality. 

For a while, I really wanted to be someone who takes beautiful pictures with a DSLR camera. Not just because I wanted the beautiful pictures, though. I think girls who carry around big cameras are so cute. They're artsy and creative and thoughtful (in my eyes). And I wanted to be that girl. 

So, I bought a camera last fall and made it my 2014 resolution to take a photography class and get really good at it. Chris even bought me a book about it!

I never used the camera or took the class. I sold it a few months ago. I'm not that girl. I drop things a lot, so I was really worried to carry it around. Also, I hate having things to carry, to the point that I often just put my ID and phone in Chris' pocket so I can go hands free (I'm that girl instead of the cool artsy girl.) I love snapping pictures with my iPhone, but I'm afraid that's where my artistic talent ends. 

I'm not a lot of other things, either. 

I don't stay up late. At all. It's almost impossible. 
I don't always find cool, new music. I love radio hits and I can't help it! 
I know nothing about makeup. I don't know what a CC cream or what shade of lipstick would be right for me. 
I don't follow sports. 
I don't iron.
I don't paint or make pottery or work with leather or do any sort of artistic hobby.
I don't speak a foreign language even though I took eight years of French. 
I don't wrap beautiful gifts. I prefer the no-measure-scrunch-and-tape method. 

I don't do some of things because I can't. But, I don't do some of these things because they aren't my priority right now.

In 2015, I want to focus on making room for the things that matter to me. I want to let go of comparison and be comfortable with the fact that some girls are really good at the things I listed above, but that doesn't mean I have to be good at them. We're all different and have wonderful, personal strengths to bring to the world.

So what am I doing in 2015? I'll tell you tomorrow!

Long ago I read Shauna Niequist's Bittersweet, which is one of my all-time favorite books and has carried me through my 20s.  In it she has a chapter "Things I Don't Do". I have always admired how she gives herself permission not to do things. Her wisdom and advice inspired this post, as well as tomorrow's. If you haven't read this book, I strongly recommend it! I also recently noticed that The Tiny Twig posted something similar a while back. Her post is great, especially if you're a mom trying to do it all :)