say it out loud

Yesterday, I got myself in just a teensy bit of trouble with some people I love, because, apparently, I told very few people about planning to go to Africa. I'd like to say this is atypical for me, but I'd be lying. I have a tendency to sit on my plans: working out every single detail, every last step, before sharing them. Just to ensure they're really going to happen. And then BAM: the big reveal.

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Back up to a few months ago, when my friend, Maggie, was giving me advice on a situation. I reaaaallly wanted something to come to fruition and she said: If you really want it to happen, say it out loud.

At the time, I wasn't exactly sure what she meant by it. Why did that make a difference? Was this some sort of Thoughts from the Universe advice?

But then, yesterday, it clicked for me. Saying it out loud is letting go of just a bit of control and admitting that you hope something will happen. You really want it to. But you're not quite sure yet if it will. Saying it out loud is being vulnerable. It's letting people in to your space before everything is aligned - before all of your ducks are in a row.

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It's saying: I trust you enough to tell you I'd like for this to happen, but if I can't work it out, I know you won't hold it against me.  And it's being confident enough to know that even if it doesn't work out, the people you love will keep on loving you. Not matter what continent you're on.

And from where I'm sitting, having the people I love by my side sounds a whole lot better than having all my ducks in a row, any day of the week.

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Sidenote: Thank you so much for everyone who has donated to my trip! I am so grateful and excited. It's really happening, now! :)

{africa bound}

Years ago, when Courtney ran her first marathon, I told her, "I have no desire to run a marathon, ever. I just don't know why you'd do that?" {coming from the cross country runner}

Fast forward five years, and there we were, running the Chicago Marathon.

When Courtney and Ashley went to Africa a few years ago, I had the same reaction. "Why would you everrr...?"

But then, something happened. Something shifted in my heart and I couldn't stop thinking about going to Africa. I wrote it in my journal every day. I dabbled on websites: how much would it cost? how long would I have to stay there?

I couldn't shake the idea that I wanted to go - needed to go.

This winter, I started reading Love Does by Bob Goff. Throughout the book, he talks about his foundation, Restore International. With every story he told, the idea got louder and louder in my head, quickly turning from a quiet hum to a steady drum beat: I want to be part of this.

At the end of the book, Bob leaves his number. For no certain reason, I decided to give him a call: why not? I rambled for what must have been the longest voicemail he's ever received, going on about how much I loved the book, how amazing what he's doing is, does he ever need help with anything? Is he coming to Atlanta anytime soon? Does he want to get coffee?

Within a few hours, he called me back and, before I knew it, he'd suggested I come to Africa with him. In the true spirit of Love Does, I just said yes before I even processed the question.

So, this fall, I'm heading to Uganda with Restore International to get involved with the movement to combat local injustice. I'll get to help build classrooms in a new school that's under construction, will visit the existing school to meet the kids enrolled (the part I'm most excited about!) and meet with local leaders. I'm so excited :)

Listen below to hear him talk with one of the students.

I've been having a hard time figuring out exactly how to raise support. I just asked my friends and family to help me build the well less than a year ago.  They say it takes a village and sometimes I feel like when they say that, they're talking about me. 

I know it's asking a lot, but if you feel compelled to support me in my trip, I would greatly appreciate it if you donated to the cause. And, if you're able to donate $20, I will send you a bracelet in the mail! :)

When I was younger, I was incredibly homesick and hated to be away from my family. On one particularly long trip, my mom and best friend, Katie, took thick, colored rubber bands and wrote notes to me on them. I never took them off, and when I was sad at night I would read them and feel comforted. They wrapped me in love and made me feel less lonely. They became so much more than something around my wrist - they stood for something bigger. 

When I go to Africa, I am bound to feel homesick (it's in the fabric of my being). I hope that when I look at my wrist and see the bracelets, I will feel comforted and supported. I will feel loved and reminded that I wouldn't have made it that far without all of you. I will be reminded that it's OK to admit you need support from one village to get you to the next one.

Thank YOU so much!

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springy weekend!

Does anyone else think that spring has totally been playing hard to get this year? So hot and cold, is she here? Is she not?

But this weekend, spring showed up just in time for two of my very favorite traditions: 420 Fest and the Dogwood Festival.

Sambam was in town, which was absolutely wonderful. 

Friday, we laid low, but I introduced him to the glories of Antico. With Sam being a true pizza connoisseur, I was a little nervous, but disappointed he was not. Why I ever doubted Antico, I'll never know. Always a winner.

Saturday, we went for a long walk and got coffee in Inman Park. Sam had never been to this part of the city, so I was excited to show him a whole new area. 

After that, we had friends over before heading to 420 Fest in Candler Park. It's easily one of my favorite events. In my mind it means it's really spring. The weather is warm, people are happy, the music is good, and the money from the tickets go directly back to park conservation. Is that not a winning combination, or what?

Sunday after Sam left, some friends and I went to the Dogwood Festival in Piedmont Park. It's a lot bigger and is more art-centric than 420, but just as happy. I accidentally got King of Pops for the second time this week. Oops! That means one thing and one thing only: it really is spring! No more hard to get.

I hope your weekend was wonderful and you spent lots of time outside!

{best friends}

Last week I mentioned that life has a way of handing me conversation after conversation on the same subject - carefully dancing around it, nudging me toward it without coming out and saying: Whitney you ought to deal with this. And normally I notice it, feeling one part shocked by coincidence and another part relieved that, yes, all we twenty something's are on the same page. 

Lately there has been a lot of talk around friendships between my friends and me (convenient people to have it with, I tell ya) and it seems that we're all trying to sort through this post-graduate world very carefully. Aware now, more than ever, how badly we yearn for deeper relationships, and yet, contrastingly, how independent we are - savoring our rare alone time and wanting to create our own worlds, establish ourselves. 

So how do you find a balance? And how do you know which of these relationships are as real and true as the ones you made in high school and college? Who can you let in to your heart? 

I was recently talking with my owly-wise friend, Maggie, about it. I was frustrated by a situation and called her and said: Mag, I need you to speak truth to me. Why is this bothering me so much? 

She told me two things. 

One, I already knew but needed to be reminded: I have a tendency to not give up on friendships (or anything- e.g. even unsalvageable DIY projects). Which, as Maggie so kindly told me, is wonderful when they're life-giving. But when they're no longer good and pure, unfortunately, is often when I really dig my heels in. It can't not work. This is a project and I will fix it! And get an A! Plus! (<<< that's my brain) 

But Maggie said you have to ask yourself this question: is this friendship depleting me? Or completing me? Because those that deplete, stress and exhaust us are not worth fighting for. The ones that are fulfilling - that both parties care deeply for one another and want to invest - are the ones you fight for even when they get rocky. 

And it's important to differentiate between the two.

Do you cut the other people out? Certainly not (unless they're truly hurtful). But because our hearts are tender and time is precious, it can help us invest wisely and understand that when the friendship isn't growing like we'd like it to, maybe it doesn't mean we try harder, but instead appreciate the friendship for what it is. Whether that be just a fun friend, or a try-new-restaurants friend or a perfect-for-work-friend, we need and crave different levels of friendship. And not everyone can be the come-in-to-the-deep-corners-of-your-heart-friend. That is a special spot, you know.

As my mom often reminds me: the very best, deep, true friendships are once in a lifetime. And if you're lucky enough to find more than one in a lifetime, you are very lucky.

I most certainly agree, Muff. :)

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